


Silly Sexual Escapades

by satirnine



Series: The Domestic Life of John and Roxy [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cats, Dick Jokes, F/M, First Time, It eventually gets serious, P vanilla, Safer Sex, Silly Sex, Vanilla, laughing during sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-14
Updated: 2017-04-14
Packaged: 2018-10-18 22:18:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10626258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/satirnine/pseuds/satirnine
Summary: It's John and Roxy's first time.Sex including but not limited to: Excessive giggling, dick jokes, John can't find the fuckin hole, Roxy can't stop giggling, plus lots of heated cheeks and corny jokes."Oh my god John, it bounced!" Roxy let out in between her giggles.The tan male's cheeks blossomed in red and he covered his face. "Roxy, don't laugh! That's perfectly normal, oh my gooood.""It's so cute!! It pulses too, ohmilord John! Lookit!" Roxy peered closer and gently poked the head before giggling again as John made a loud whine of embarrassment. "Johnny! I love your dick it's so cute!" Leaning even closer, she pressed a soft kiss to the head.-Can stand alone!-





	

Simple makeouts on the couch turned into something a bit more heated as soon as Roxy rocked her hips against John's hips. A squeak escaped the male and Roxy pulled back with a sheepish smile. "Sorry Johnny boy, just got a lil too into it!" She bit her lip and started to pull back, but was a little surprised herself when John pulled her back and smiled against her lips. 

"No, Roxy, it's okay." John reached up to brush thick blonde curls from her forehead to press a gentle, sweet kiss there. "We could, uhm." A swallow made's John's adam apple bob and Roxy couldn't help but to smile and press a soft kiss to it. "Do the full sex? If you wanted." He offered, running a hand through Roxy's hair gently. Roxy giggled and kissed up the column of John's neck, prompting him to tilt his head up as to let her mouth just underneath his jaw. He bit his lip and ran one hand down her back to coax her hips closer by pressing on the small of her back. She pulled from his neck to sit up, again gently gyrating her hips down against John's half-hard chub.

"The full sex sounds like a wonderful thing to do." She said, her voice almost purring. She ran her hands down his chest, over the soft chub of his stomach to rest at his hips as she leaned closer for more shared kisses and little lip nips. More sexy makeouts occurred, both parties slipping their eyes shut as John began to make soft noises into the kiss. After a bit though, Roxy let out a little huff of frustration and tried to rock down harder. All that brought for her was a sharp gasp from John, but unfortunately her tiny short and underwear just started feeling weird and sticky against her. John pulled back, furrowing his eyebrows at her obvious frustration. "Jooohhnnn. I'm horny now and this doesn't feel goooood." She pouted, reaching up to trace a finger over his chest. 

"Oh, then." He kissed her forehead and sat up, framing her thin hips. "Move to the bedroom?" He offered, face red from embarrassment and arousal. Roxy grinned and nodded, getting off John's lap to stand up and gently take his hands, pulling him up and kissing him softly again. Then, she turned him around and gently pushed him towards the bedroom. Stumbling to avoid stepping on a cat, John headed towards said room, Roxy in hot pursuit and never failing to press little kisses all over the back of his neck. Drippingly sweet kisses. 

Eventually they make it to the bedroom only to find... Mr. Grump on the bed. Roxy lets out a little sigh, stepping in front of John to pet the large cat's head. "Mr. Mewgarita, you need to exacuate the premises of the bed." The cat just swished it's tail. Roxy turned towards John with a helpless look. John in his sexy tent-in-le-shorts awkward look. 

"Roxy, I'm not having a threesome with a cat, I'm sorry, that's illegal." He giggled softly when Roxy started giggling, and Roxy heaved the large breed cat up. With the cat growling and downright pissed, Roxy gently set him outside the door, ushering him away. He stalked away, still angry, and Roxy slowly shut the door behind. 

"Now the only kitties in here are the kittens and possibly mama. But she knows what sex is, John. Don't make me evacuate the kittens from the closet, they're too young." Roxy brings out the puppy-dog eyes that John can't resist, and he sighs, walking up to Roxy, leaning down and bringing her chin up to kiss her softly. 

"Fine." He chuckled, and Roxy gently pushed the taller, tan man to the bed to bed, gently pushing him onto it and smiling.

"Good. Now, time to get clothes off." She kissed his nose and pulled back, tugging off her tanktop to start the stripping party. The stripping party ended rather quickly as John slipped out of his shorts and shirt, keeping his boxers on for now, and Roxy kept hers on too, though she hadn't been wearing a bra so her lil boobs were out. Initiate awkwardness. Roxy climbed up onto the bed, framing John's cheeks with her small, pale hands and kissed his nose, straddling his waist and rocking against him through layers of underwear again. John let out a soft groan, looping his arms around her waist, but she pulled back, raising his hands to the top of his back, and he took the initiative to run his hands around to gently grope her breasts. She let out a little coo and slipped her pink eyes shut, leaning forward to attempt to kiss him, but missing and getting his chin at an awkward angle. He giggled and tilted his chin to capture her lips and properly kiss her, running a thumb over her nipples. She let out the prettiest of gasps and ran her hands down his soft sides to tuck her fingers under the waistband of his boxers. A soft shudder and she was pulling back from the kiss, lifting up the offending underwear, keeping her from his cute dick and tugging them down. John's erection bounced up to attention and Roxy started giggling.

"Oh my god John, it bounced!" Roxy let out in between her giggles.The tan male's cheeks blossomed in red and he covered his face. 

The tan male's cheeks blossomed in red and he covered his face. "Roxy, don't laugh! That's perfectly normal, oh my gooood."

"It's so cute!! It pulses too, ohmilord John! Lookit!" Roxy peered closer and gently poked the head before giggling again as John made a loud whine of embarrassment. "Johnny! love your dick it's so cute!" Leaning even closer, she pressed a soft kiss to the head. John gasped, peeking through his hands to look at his lovely girlfriend, who now gave a little sly grin and rested her hands on his thighs, pressing more soft kisses down his chub. He inhaled sharply and moved his hands down to gently rest at her shoulders. She hummed and licked up his dick like a kitten, small little licks until she reached the head again, then popped it into her mouth and sucked on it. John outright moaned, face flushing. 

Roxy pulled back, shimmying out of her panties and tossing them to the side, ignoring the little wet patch she left. John raked his eyes down her body, immediately pulling her closer by her back and kissing all over his cheeks. "Hnnngg, you're so cute, Roxy." He mumbled, smiling and kissing her lips. 

"Mm, you're cute too, Johnny." She cooed, running her hands down his chest and over his stomach, moving to kiss a soft trail down his neck, collarbones, and then to his pectorals, still gently rubbing the chub he had from years of being nearly force-fed cakes, and his acquired sweet tooth. Another blush blossomed over his cheeks and he chewed on his lower lip as Roxy smiled up at him before moving her hips closer to gently rub her vulva against his dick. They both let out a soft moan, and Roxy sat up again to kiss him silly. But had to pull back to regrettably stand up and grab a condom out of the top drawer of the nightstand to the side of the bed. John took this time to clear the bed of clothes and sit back more, watching Roxy as she came back, fumbling to open the condom. She eventually got the rubber out, smiling at John as she straddled his waist again.

She gently rolled the condom onto his dick, thankful that it was the right size and gently pumped him through the condom twice. He moaned, eyes fluttering shut. Roxy kissed over his cheeks before nibbling at his lower lip and gently sucking on it. John gently held her hips and pulled her closer, maneuvering to try to press into her. He tried multiple times, Roxy giggling as he continued to miss, but letting out soft breathy noises at the attention to her slick vulva anyway. After another moment and John getting adorably frustrated, she reached down to gently grip the top of his dick, leading it to her opening and pressing the head in. She gasped and pulled her hand away, gently rocking farther down as John muffled his own sounds by biting down on his lip. Roxy made a slow descent down his thick dick, and after being full seated on his dick, she let out a soft exhale and kissed him again, pulling his face close by his full cheeks. 

As soon as she was ready, Roxy pulled up, almost completely off John's length, then pressed back down, pulling noises of pleasure out of both parties. But, John couldn't help but giggle. "Are we ready for take-off?" He snorts. 

Roxy giggled and rolled her eyes, lifting up to drop back down, her pretty pink vagina quickly enveloping John's dick. His giggles are cut off with a moan and Roxy nods. "Aye aye captain, all sails set." She chuckled, leaning forward to kiss and suck at his neck, beginning to actually ride him. Both moans progressively get louder, and after a bit, John moves his hand from Roxy's side to trail down to her vulva, searching for a moment before finding what he's looking for, if Roxy's gasp is anything to go off of. He rubs her clit in little circles and finds her lips to bring them together, kissing up her noises along with his own. Roxy speeds up and occasionally accidentally causes John to slip out, but after some giggling and quick fixing, get right back on track. Eventually Roxy has to pull from the series of kisses to arch her back and moan louder, hips moving erraticly and John starts to buck up into her, biting down on his lip to keep quiet and just listen to Roxy. John surprisingly comes first, gasping and jerking his hips up as he comes into latex. He doesn't stop, just speeding up his finger against her clit and letting her bounce on his slowly softening dick until she's crying out, hips jerking as she rides out her orgasm. After her hips stop jerking, she collapses against John's chest, batting his hand away from her clit and pulling off of him with little noises from both of them. She lets out and exhausted giggle and tugs the condom off, tying it up and dropping it into the trashcan.

John wraps his arms around Roxy and pulls her close, and she nuzzles into his neck and hugs him right back. John lays down, kissing her forehead and tangling his legs with hers, squeezing her and taking a deep breath.

"Hot." Roxy mumbles, kissing his neck. "That was hella hot, Johnny. Feel good?"

"I feel wonderful." He murmured, smiling and running a hand through his hair. "I love you."

"I love you too."

The mama kitty walked out of the closet, cooing and jumping up onto the bed to curl up on John's chest right next to Roxy as they dozed off happily.


End file.
